I was asked to speak on discipline at MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers). I'm speaking along with two other ladies. My portion is on self-discipline. If that isn't a laugh! I am so undisciplined in several areas. Me being asked to talk about and give advice on self-discipline is like asking my 18 month old to explain why markers are used for drawing on paper.
An example of lack of discipline: Last Thursday I was sick with a cold and sinus infection. (I'm still battling the infection...I'm determined to get over it without a doctor's visit.) I woke up feeling that I had been smacked in the head with a bat. But there are no sick days in Mommyhood. Most of my everyday duties got accomplished. Kids were fed, homeschooling supervised, laundry somewhat done, toddler messes picked up, no one had to get stitches.....and the reward was bedtime. However, no dishes got washed. I have a hate relationship with washing dishes. With a family of eight, washing dirty dishes is ne.ver.end.ing. Not having a dishwasher for over a year (because of electrical issues) has been unpleasant to say the least! *Don't take this as whining and ungratefulness because I feel so blessed to have running water and a house full of little people.* So, the dishes didn't get done, oh well. Then Friday came and I was feeling better but not great. My kids were at
Friday School, so it was just me and my littlest. I got a few chores done but I closed my eyes to the mountain of dirty dishes. Maybe if I didn't see them they would go away. It was more fun to
be lazy have snuggle time with my baby then get my hands pruney in dishwater. Earlier in the week my wonderful, jack-of-all-trades brother-in-law fixed my electrical problem and we were getting a dishwasher! I knew this in the back of my mind which is a little of the reason I let the stinky, crusty dishes set in the sink, on the counter top, and stove. Friday came and went with dishes undone.
The only thing worse than washing dishes is waking up to a kitchen overtaken by dirty
bowls and plates and glasses and mugs and pots and pans. There was not one piece of clean silverware. Cooking was almost impossible. (The grossness of all of this is not lost on me.) I knew that Saturday afternoon we were getting the much anticipated new appliance! Just a few more hours of shielding my eyes from the embarrassing sight of the kitchen. I know some of you are thinking that I have several big kids who could/should be doing dishes.
Yes, they should and they do. But their school workload has been so full lately that I haven't been making them. And for some reason they don't volunteer to in their little free time.
Because of busyness we didn't end up getting the dishwasher until late Saturday evening. I was very excited to see it hooked up and doing its business. But... we didn't quite have everything it took for it to be hooked up (sigh) so I had to wait until after church on Sunday. Are you counting the days? That would be day FOUR of only washing a dish here and there to get by. After an hour of Hubby and Austin installing the beauty we turn it on and NOTHING!! ?!?!? The outlet quit working again. This old house has problems. (Hopefully not dangerous complications....electricity can be scary.) After 3+ hours of washing dishes by hand my husband comes in the house with an extension cord. Wha? What? You mean I spent over 3 hours with my hands drowning in hot, soapy water scouring dried on food when we could have plugged it in somewhere else? WAIT! You mean I could have had a dishwasher 13 months ago and just plugged it into another outlet?!
I would have been more than happy to wind up a cord after every use. Why did I not think of that? We are having the outlet looked at again but in the meantime you will not hear one complaint from me about tripping over a heavy duty cord that rests across the kitchen floor. The point of this story is if I was more self disciplined I would have washed those dirty dishes right away instead of waiting until I was ready to move out and leave all dishes behind. Housekeeping isn't the only thing that takes an extra dose of self discipline for me. I like sleeping in. No, I LOVE sleeping in. My bed is so soft and cozy and warm. It begs me not to leave. It whispers promises of comfort and sweet dreams.
I don't like to disappoint. When it asks me to stay for just 5 more minutes, I almost always comply. Today I have decided to end the relationship. When my queen-size love dressed in king-sized clothing insists I spend "just a little longer" wrapped in its coziness, I will resist. Maybe not all mornings but most. I'm telling you this because I need accountability. Go ahead. Give me a call at 8:00. I'll be downstairs and ready for the day. Today instead of pulling the covers over my head when Court got up, I got up too. It felt good to see him off to work and to have a bit of alone time before the house awakened with the noise of laughing, crying, yelling, singing, stomping, clapping and all the other sounds of the Bitting house. I'm taking the challenge of self-discipline. I know it won't be easy. "No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it."
Hebrews 12:11 I want my children to reap the rewards of being self-disciplined. I want to be a good example.
So, I'm dying to know.....how do you stay self-disciplined??
8 comments:
I clean the house, every single night, usually for 1-2 hours. I don't like it at all. I don't know how I do it, I just do, because it is asked of me. I guess I can stay self disciplined because I don't like the complaints when it is not picked up and everything put away. So, um, preventing complaints are my motivation.
If I remember correctly you have never liked doing dishes. I'm right there with you. That's why I continue to put dishes in the ancient dishwasher provided by those who own the home we live in. I know most of the time a good amount of them will need to be rewashed but I continue to live in hope that more will come out clean then dirty. At some point I give up and handwash but the majority of the time the dirty ones get put right back in the dishwasher for another round.
Kelly - I have had the same problem with dishwashers until I started using "Finish" powerball dish tablets. I use 2 per load. One in holder and the other I toss in at the beginning. It has managed to clean my dishes even in old machines, whereas the liquid and powder detergents failed.
I am using the Finish tablets but only one and also the rinse. Maybe I should try two.
When I was growing up, we got our first dishwasher on my 9th birthday. It was a portable one, so we had to either walk across the kitchen into our utility room or roll it into the kitchen for loading and unloading. However, I was so excited about getting a dishwasher, I didn't care. I thought about this this week when my dishwasher stopped working at home and we had to have the plumber come out and fix it. I'll think about not having one at your house o'many children for 13 months tonight after dinner.... (oh, and I am NOT self disiplined. the end.)
i don't know how you let dishes go that long jamie! we would be out of dishes in less than 2 days because we don't have enough dishes to go longer:). oh, and we have dishwasher issues all the time.(ours actually dirties the dishes rather than cleans them. everything on top comes out with crud spackled all over them. i rewash a lot by hand.) and i can't live with countertops being covered - everyone's supposed to clear their dishes & put them directly into the dishwasher after they eat. it doesn't always work, but we try:). the biggest thing i feel i should be better disciplined about is i would like to get up before the boys to do bible reading, but i suppose it's not a discipline thing, it's a more a priority thing.
I think that that is the key, Apryl, it is more what you make a priority than just being disciplined.
Self-discipline.....hmmmmm.....we're so in process. Dishes, that's a day job since the eyes play tricks at night.
When the children were all at home i used my time with them many times to do chores and had them help. We would put on plenty of loud worship music and dance and work. Other times we created wonderful messes be they food or crafts.
Now it's just Mr Mutt and me, but it works. He keeps me aware of any intruders be they friend or foe.
Frankly,though, if we could just do away with eating and dirty dishes, discipline from over eating would be easy.....sigh! Alas, though we have an extremely loving Daddy that guides us, comforts us, disciplines and rewards us. Leaning into Him is really the only way. From what i've observed of you and your family, you're doing a good job of leaning!
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